Keep on going...

(Writer's note: Another article that was published in 2002 in an alumni's homepage that's no longer there)

How many of us could honestly admit that we had NEVER ever felt like giving up on something? It might have been a project, a crush, a diet – anything you had worked on so hard but at one point of time you just feel like you had enough and wanted to quit… Feeling like giving up is normal – nevertheless, actually giving up should never be encouraged… Sounds cliché, but it had been proven time and again – winners never quit, quitters never win (with special exceptions of those who quit smoking, drinking, drug taking and the like)

Now, to think that I almost gave up on my studies a couple of years back...

At one point of time, I was so sick of the difficult-to-digest thick volumes of law books that preparing for tutorials and lectures became sheer torture. I had to force myself to open up some books but I got dizzy trying to read the tiny almost- illegible manuscripts. Going to the library was a worse option – a half step into the musty, creaky half-wooden building was enough to cause nausea. I went to lectures, but unable to really pay attention to what was said. Things went from bad to worse as I started to miss tutorials and even skipped some classes on subjects I found most difficult to comprehend.

My grades kept going down. My morale was low. I really felt like giving it up

After listening to my grievances, a close friend remarked that it was not too late to admit that taking up law was a mistake. I still had time to quit then and take up another course of my preference. I chewed over that thought for some time.

However, discussions with older, more experienced friends and acquaintances (including the Dean of Law Faculty in my university) led me to look at it from a different, broader perspective. I was more than halfway through – it was one year before the course would be completed. I was in the University of Leeds on a government loan and owed it to the rakyat to finish what I started. Other people would be so grateful to be in my shoes, hence I should not shrug off my responsibility as a loan holder that easily. Or so I was reminded…

While I was convinced that it would cause a lot of pain and difficulty – the best thing to do was to finish what I started… To complete the degree programme first, then to move on…

Of course, to quit then and there would without doubt cause a lot of difficulties. How to pay MARA back would be a major cause of headache. Facing my father’s wrath would be another. Besides, there was no guarantee of excelling in another course, not to mention there was no guarantee on getting another loan to fund it.

Thus, I persevered.

With my counsellor’s and mentor’s assistance, I learned to change my attitudes and perceptions towards my course. My mentor, Mr Passey, in particular was especially helpful in assisting me to choose the subjects to be studied in my final year. We avoided all the dry, bookish ones, and I ended up taking up many subjects which were more sociology-inclined. Mostly subjects that were also graded by a combination of essays and exams, since Mr Passey believed that it would take some of the headaches away if I didn’t rely too heavily on exams.

Alhamdulillah, I succeeded – did even better than what many expected. While my grades only qualified me for a general degree in my second year, I made up for it in my last year. I finally graduated with honours and managed to get exempted from paying back the government loan.

A sweet success indeed.

That experience taught me how beneficial it is to seek help and advice from others when one feels like quitting. Listening to different views and recommendations could really facilitate critical decision-making. Chances are, a new outlook and a refreshed attitude will help to overcome any obstacle that may come our way in finishing what we have begun. Be patient – for Allah is always with those who are patient. Have faith in His promise and keep on persevering.

Remember - “Verily, with the hardship, there is relief.” (Al-Insyirah 94:6)